Gary and I had been married for two years when we found out about his condition. At 34, he was diagnosed with Autosomal Dominant Polycystic Kidney Disease (ADPKD). As it turned out, he had had the disease for years and, by this time, his kidneys were almost double their normal size.

ADPKD is a genetic disorder that leads to the growth of fluid-filled cysts that can eventually overtake the kidneys and lead to renal failure. “Autosomal dominant” refers to the fact that, if one parent has the disease, there is a 50% chance that his or her child will develop it.

Despite the large number of cysts, Gary’s renal function was still good at the time of his diagnosis. The doctor said that some patients may not progress to end stage kidney disease, but there was nothing Gary could do to stop the progression. He was told that his sisters and brother, as well as both parents, should be tested. We were relieved and surprised to find out that no one else in the family had the disease.

After the initial shock of the diagnosis, we resumed our very normal lives for the next 12 years or so. Gary ran his own business selling and servicing sewing machines and I worked in media and communications. Despite being cautioned against having children by a well-intentioned but tactless geneticist, we became the proud parents of a daughter and a son.

By the time Gary was about 46, his nephrologist began to chart the road to Gary’s kidney failure and urged him to start looking for a donor. Gary has never been one to ask a favour from family or friends, much less ask for an organ. One day at a family dinner when Gary was out of the room, his sister asked me what Gary would like for his birthday. I mustered up my courage and told her that what he could really use was a kidney.

An extremely close-knit family, each member quickly started their donor testing. I soon learned what an amazing transplant program we have here in Manitoba, as each of the siblings outside of Winnipeg ran into challenges having their testing completed. Gary’s family members were ruled out one by one, with the last being his youngest sister. The day she called us with the news was a difficult one.

I knew I was up next. As I started my testing, his sister’s partner selflessly stepped up as well. We both went through testing at the same time. After an agonizing two years of potential donor testing, I was declared as the best match. Meanwhile, Gary’s renal function was diminishing and kidney failure was looming. Then, another bump in the road: When he was going through his pre-surgery work-up, a spot was seen on an x-ray of his kidney. To rule out cancer, he would have to have a CT scan, which would require him to go on dialysis immediately, as the dye used in the scan could further damage his kidneys.

The transplant was on hold. Gary started hemodialysis. Fortunately, the scan ruled out cancer and we were scheduled for the transplant. Gary felt like a million bucks as soon as he woke up from the surgery.

We were so fortunate to have the help and love of many people as we recovered. Our kids took on extra chores, family and friends brought meals and drove the kids to their activities and, of course, the transplant team were on top of Gary’s post-surgical care. A childhood friend of Gary’s even arranged for limo service to and from the transplant clinic every morning the first month.

Kidney disease has been a third partner in our marriage for almost 25 years. For several of those years, it has not been a silent one. Although we know that the transplant won’t last forever, we’re also aware that no one can predict the future. We are happy and extremely grateful for the good fortune we have had in maintaining our health so far and look forward to many great years ahead.